Seven Simple Ways to Make Your Life Together Better

The pandemic changed the way couples live together. Most of the time, people say they are feeling stressed. New studies are showing how things can work out for the better.

A lot of folks said that life together has improved. The improvement was that they learned to talk and act in new ways.

Experts say the following are some ways to improve life together.

Keep Track of the Good Stuff

What works? Examples include compliments, goodbye kisses, buying flowers, cooking meals, and cleaning up. Positive words and actions work much better than negative ones.

Anger takes things downhill. Laughing, smiling, touching, and saying nice things make disagreements easier to get past. They may not solve every problem but may help couples get through hard times.

Being generous also is good. An expert said there is a virtue in “giving good things to one’s spouse freely and abundantly.” Examples include making coffee, showing affection, and forgiving.

Hold Hands

Holding hands is good. Why? Touching is a good way to connect. Hand-holding also lowers stress. Research shows that holding hands takes some stress away from the person in pain. When partners take our hand, they take some of the emotional burdens.

Think about how it feels to touch your partner. Hold hands when you head out the door or watch television. Spend hand-holding time talking about things that are on your mind. It may be things like money, kids, or work.

Read to Each Other

Why? People grow closer when they share thoughts and ideas. Reading aloud is a way to experience something new together. You will enjoy reading to someone and having them read to you.

Each partner picks a favorite story. Do not only listen to the words. Take note of your partner’s voice. Talk about what you read and why you chose it.

Accept the Small Problems

Write down one or two of your partner’s annoying habits. They may be small things like not paying bills or dropping clothes on the floor. Talk about those things, but do not be critical. Try to find reasons why they happen. It could be your partner had a bad day at work.

Much of the time, such conflicts are not solved. “Acceptance therapy” helps people make changes on their own. Even if change does not take place, acceptance may bring a couple closer together.

Share Your Perfect Day

Think about your best day. Share the details with your partner. Include your likes, dislikes, hopes, and dreams. Try to plan a version of a perfect day together.

These questions and details help people get to know each other better. Talking about your perfect day is a way of telling your partner about yourself. It is a way to make a deeper connection between you.

Feel Each Other’s Heartbeat

Eye contact and touch create feelings of closeness. Things get better when partners hug, hold hands or kiss the other. Eye contact and touch are powerful ways of making a deeper connection with your partner.

Take a few minutes with your partner in a quiet space. Now follow these steps:

Stand and face each other.

Each of you should place your right hand on the other’s chest, over the heart.

Bring your left hand to your chest and cover your partner’s hand.

Spend the next minute looking into each other’s eyes as your hands rest on each other’s hearts and hands.

Try not to giggle or speak. Be mindful of each other’s breathing. Be present and quiet together. After a minute, take a breath. Discuss how it felt to you.

Practice Gratitude Together

Write down three things about your partner for which you feel grateful. Take a moment to read what you wrote about each other. Are you surprised by your partner’s feelings? Talk about these moments and how they make you feel more connected to each other.

Showing gratitude is a common way to boost happiness. It helps us get better sleep and can even sometimes reduce illness. Gratitude exercises also can make us feel closer to our romantic partners.

Source: The New York Times February 11, 2022